Posted by CBS.

Source: The Late Show with David Letterman.

01.03.2008 From the home office in Wahoo, Nebraska... THE "LATE SHOW" TOP TEN "Demands of the Striking Writers"
[As presented by 10 striking writers on the Wednesday, Jan. 2 broadcast of the LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN, seen weeknights (11:35 PM‑12:37 AM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network.]

10. From "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," Tim Carvell: "Complimentary tote bag with next insulting contract offer."

9. From "The Colbert Report," Laura Krafft: "No rollbacks in health benefits, so I can treat the hypothermia I caught on the picket lines."

8. Daytime television writer, Melissa Salmons: "Full salary and benefits for my imaginary writing partner, Lester."

7. From "Law & Order: Criminal Intent," Warren Leight: "Members of the AMPTP must explain what the hell AMPTP stands for."

6. From "The Colbert Report," Jay Katsir: "No disciplinary action taken against any writer caught having inappropriate relationship with a copier."

5. From "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," Steve Bodow: "I'd like a date with a woman."

4. Writer and director, Nora Ephron: "Hazard pay for breaking up fights on 'The View.'"

3. From "Law & Order," Gina Johnfrido: "I'm no accountant, but instead of us getting 4 cents for a $20 DVD, how about we get $20 for a 4-cent DVD?"

2. From "Late Night with Conan O'Brien," Chris Albers: "I don't have a joke - I just want to remind everyone that we're on strike, so none of us are responsible for this lame list."

1. Thurber Award-winning author, Alan Zwiebel: "Producers must immediately remove their heads from their asses."

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